Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway |
Every "writer" has it, and even I do, too, dear reader: a secret fear that when you sit down to pen your daily missive, your wit and vigor will have deserted you. And by you, I mean me. I've been doing this for nigh on half a year now, and every lunchtime I consider the possibility that I might not be able to come up with a hilarious, witty, incisive newsletter by suppertime for your consumption the following morning. Of course, as millions can attest, the fear is always misplaced because these newsletters are always [chef's kiss] super. The irony is that the better a writer you are, the bigger the daily fear. In my case, there's millions of dollars on the line each day thanks solely to my insane talent. It's why I became a committed drunk for so many years, so that I could function. Just ask Ernest Hemingway's corpse. I always write the intros last and top them off with a reasonably high-quality cheese pun because I love you. Now you have an insight into the workings of William Cheddspeare. In today's case, Fear the Reaper is a cheddar cheese that contains Carolina Reaper peppers, available from Ehlenbach's Cheese Chalet in Wisconsin. I have a feeling my editor will lurve it because he has a thing about chilis. Meanwhile the word "turophobia" is a Greek term that refers to the fear of cheese. It's derived from the Greek words tȳrós meaning "cheese" and -phobia meaning "phobia." People with turophobia, apparently, may experience: disgust, inability to touch cheese, difficulty approaching cheese, and extreme discomfort when seeing cheese. They also need someone to say a different word when they're posing for photographs, obviously. Want some cheddlines? Say cheese: Turophobiaphobia is the fear of the fear of cheese. —Matt Davis, Need2Know Chedditor P.S. "Hawk Tuah girl" (a.k.a. Haliey Welch) has got a team of lawyers now, after a bunch of people lost money on her memecoin. Check out the story on our 'gram. |
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"All that demand, all those ideas and the wishes and wants are going to come to fruition." —Dena Jalbert |
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1. I'm Taking Weight-Loss Drugs, Says Elon Musk |
Elon "Svelte Like Little Girl" Musk took to X on Christmas to showcase his noticeably slimmer figure. Clad in a Santa suit, Musk captioned it "Ozempic Santa," then in a subsequent tweet said it was "technically Mounjaro." Rrowr!
The tech mogul's revelation sparked a flurry of curiosity amongst his followers, leading to comparisons between Mounjaro and Ozempic, both of which are GLP-1 medications used for type 2 diabetes and weight management. Musk shared his personal experience with both drugs, noting that although he had experimented with Ozempic, Mounjaro emerged as the more suitable option for him, with fewer side effects and greater effectiveness.
Musk's venture into weight management drugs is not entirely new; he has openly shared his use of another GLP-1 medication, Wegovy, in the past. Additionally, Musk has talked about incorporating intermittent fasting into his lifestyle, offering a glimpse into his multifaceted approach to maintaining health.
Despite Musk's endorsement, voices like incoming health secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. advocate for prioritizing lifestyle changes and proper nutrition as the primary strategy for weight management, positioning GLP-1 drugs as a supplementary measure at best, a Big Pharma conspiracy at worst. Otherwise, how can we judge anyone for being fat, the thinking goes? I suppose we could just judge them for being poor like always? After all Mounjaro is $1,069.08 a month, out-of-pocket. In other words, Musk can pay for it for the next 411,568,825 months, no problem. Read More |
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2. We Know How to Make Money, Says OpenAI |
OpenAI has announced its plan to transform its operational structure from a non-profit entity into a public benefit corporation. The transition signals a significant shift in the organization's strategy, aiming to harness more capital to fuel its ambitious projects, including the advancement of AI, as if you couldn't have guessed from its name.
The company candidly shared in a recent blog post that attracting adequate investment requires aligning with traditional business practices, including offering conventional equity to backers. This is a significant departure from its initial vision in 2015, when OpenAI was founded as a research-centric non-profit, committed to the open and charitable advancement of AI technologies. Most nonprofits take a few decades to abandon their missions and become industries dedicated to the enrichment of their staff shareholders, of course, so OpenAI has acted in character by going faster.
In a statement fooling nobody, OpenAI suggests that the transition will not dilute its commitment to "public welfare." Instead, it posits that a successful for-profit wing will underpin and strengthen its non-profit initiatives, particularly in crucial areas like healthcare, education, and science.
The company recently secured $6.6 billion in funding, a testament to its valuation at an eye-watering $157 billion. Notably, Microsoft, OpenAI's largest investor with a 49% stake, is poised to play a critical role in the realignment. The intricacies of how Microsoft's stake will be adjusted post-transition are yet to be delineated. But they're suckers for public welfare. I know that.
OpenAI is not alone in adopting a public benefit corporation model within the AI sector. Rivals like Anthropic and Elon Musk's xAI have already embraced the structure. Read More |
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| "Hawk Tuah" girl Haliey Welch went from viral fame to memecoin drama. Now she's teamed up with lawyers to set the record straight. |
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3. You Can Soon Stream 'Beyoncé Bowl' on Netflix. It's 12 Minutes Long. |
Beyoncé once again stole the show, but this time from your living room, as Netflix delivered a festive treat with the streaming debut of her halftime performance during their Christmas Day NFL special. As the Baltimore Ravens claimed victory over her hometown Houston Texans (who completely and utterly sucked, incidentally—seriously, imagine buying a ticket for that game and watching the home team lose that badly to a team from Baltimore), it was Beyoncé who won the evening, enchanting a massive audience with her "Cowboy Carter"–themed halftime extravaganza.
For those who missed the live streaming event, fret not—we will delineate the intricacies for you. Netflix has quickly turned around to offer the full 12-minute "Beyoncé Bowl" as a standalone special, now available for viewing at your leisure. The show, featuring themes tied to her recent country-tinged album "Cowboy Carter," originally lit up NRG Stadium with both splendor and spectacle.
The setlist for the Beyoncé Bowl was nothing short of grand, beginning and ending with "16 Carriages" and "Texas Hold 'Em," respectively. In between, viewers were treated to a parade of tunes including "Blackbiird," "Ya Ya," "Sweet Honey Buckin'," and "Levii's Jeans." You will not believe your ii's. Or your eears. Read More |
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4. When the Ball Drops, Will the Dealmaking Pick Up? |
In the dynamic world of mergers and acquisitions, 2024 saw a gradual resurgence in deal activity, setting the stage for a potential M&A explosion in 2025. Dena Jalbert, the founder and CEO of Align Advisory, said deal activity gained momentum as 2024 progressed, particularly in Q3 and Q4. "As interest rates started to ratchet down, it freed up some capital, the cost of capital became a little less expensive," she explained. "And so, with that, the floodgates kind of opened a bit and you saw some pretty good-sized deals roll through."
Infrastructure and technology were key sectors, and Jalbert highlighted the role of substantial investments from major players like Blackstone and BlackRock, coupled with strategic M&A, in driving the infrastructure boom. The regulatory environment also played a crucial role in shaping deal outcomes in 2024. The proposed merger between Albertsons and Kroger, for instance, was blocked due to concerns about potential price increases for consumers. Jalbert believes that this deal might have been approved under a different administration. "We are definitely going to head into a much different regulatory environment as we move into '25," she said, hypothetically. Wait.
Jalbert predicts a significant surge in M&A activity in 2025, driven by pent-up demand, a shifting regulatory landscape, and increased access to capital. "The last two years, M&A obviously has slowed... Now that that's ratcheting down, couple that with a regulatory environment... all that demand, all those ideas and the wishes and wants are going to come to fruition," she said, sounding like a Beatles fan in 1963.
Sectors like media and professional services are also expected to witness heightened consolidation in 2025. "I think you're going to be quite busy on Mondays announcing a lot of deals that are closing in from the week before," she told Cheddar. Can't buy me love! Read More |
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5. Netflix's Xmas Day Games Set Streaming Record |
24.2 million viewers watched Netflix's inaugural NFL games on Christmas Day. The Chiefs celebrated the birth of Jesus Christ by thrashing the Steelers 29–10 and the Ravens thrashed the Texans 31–2. So much for drama. Also (see above): Beyoncé. She pulled in 27 million viewers. And thrashed them.
The equally competitive Mike Tyson–Jake Paul boxing fight reached 65 million viewers. But concerns about streaming hiccups, which shadowed the Tyson–Paul fight due to buffering issues and unsatisfactory picture quality, were quelled this holiday season.
Netflix's chief content officer, Bela Bajaria, called it a "record-breaking day," underscoring the strategic shift for a company primarily known for its original and licensed TV shows. The impact of such an offering reaches beyond mere viewership numbers; it reshapes the cultural experience of shports, aligning it with the comforts of home shtreaming.
Pretty soon Netflix will be almost as good as cable television, and then what will we do? Presumably Comcast will buy Netflix in the predicted burst of media M&A activity and it'll be 1993 again. Or perhaps AOL will buy the whole thing outright. "Nothing ever happens," as Scottish rock band Del Amitri once wrote. "The needle returns to the start of the song and we all sing along like before." Say "fromage"! Read More |
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