Jan 17, 2025

We've Reached a Cheesefire Agreement

I can guarantee that this is the only newsletter you'll be (un?)subscribing to today that makes a cheese pun out of ending a war. On the other hand, I do take pride in saying the things that are difficult to say, like tongue Zwisters. And Zwister, as we all know, means Swiss in Dutch, and it is a variant of Farmhouse Gouda with an extra culture added to provide more tang. It is a must-try for those who love strong, full-flavored cheeses, so in other words? It's just like this newsletter. Meanwhile today's news stories you Need2Know are full of things that are hard to say:

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.

—Matt Davis, Need2Know Chedditor

Quote of the Day

"Take the genes that are from the mammoth, that made a mammoth, a mammoth, and engineer them into its closest living relative being the Asian elephant." — Ben Lamm

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1. Biden Warns of Oligarchy in Farewell Address

In his farewell address to the nation Joe Biden, at 82, did not merely offer a recapitulation of his time in office but instead issued a clarion call for vigilance against the rising tide of "oligarchy." Or maybe he confused it with the rise of "octogenarians?"

Perhaps to make a more salient point about Biden's ability to connect with a broad swath of Americans these days, the Associated Press ran a story the next morning with the headline, "What does 'Oligarchy' mean?'"

Oof. With the wealthy "tech-industrial complex" at its helm, this oligarchy wields a power that threatens to undermine the very fabric of American democracy, Biden said. The unchecked influence of extreme wealth and power could, Biden said, overshadow the basic rights and freedoms that form the backbone of the nation. Unless the naughty nation's father gives it a pardon, I guess? Like dude, you don't get to give a moral lecture to Americans when you intervened to keep your crackhead son out of court. Even if I do, broadly speaking, think you've got a good heart. Somewhere. Possibly.

Meanwhile the Washington Post, owned by Amazon founder Jeff Bezos, launched a mission yesterday to "reach 200 million Americans" with "riveting storytelling." The publication didn't respond to questions from the New York Times about its recent newsroom hiccups including the resignation of a cartoonist after the editors pulled a cartoon satirical of Mr. Bezos and other tech giants like Elon Musk.

Musk's financial backing of political campaigns, alongside the broader tech industry's sway over public opinion and misinformation, exemplifies the "dangerous concentration of power" Biden warns against, on his way out the door and into irrelevance.

Heralding his administration's achievements in job creation, infrastructure, healthcare, and pandemic response — he inherited a mess and, broadly speaking, did a reasonable job of cleaning it up before he showed up for a reelection debate looking 15 years older than he needed to, showing that his judgement is way off on what counts in American politics. Biden also shone a spotlight on the environmental and informational battlegrounds that his successor inherits. The fight against climate change (now at risk from powerful interests prioritizing profit over the planet) and the battle against the "avalanche of misinformation" (aided by social media's retreat from fact-checking) will be "challenges" for the years ahead, he said.

Meanwhile, did you see that Mark Zuckerberg had a stylist in and did a three-hour interview with Joe Rogan revealing "the real Mark?" Read More

2. Israel and Hamas Reach Ceasefire Deal

After 15 relentless months of conflict that saw immense human and infrastructural devastation, a much-needed break in the violence between Israel and Hamas has finally been secured.

Mediated by the United States along with active participation from Egypt and Qatar, the agreement heralds a potential shift in one of the most enduring and bitter conflicts in the Middle East. If there's one thing I've learned about the conflict in the Middle East, it's to say glib things about it and assume that everyone I'm talking to holds the same opinion. Right? Riiiight. So…

President Joe Biden, alongside Qatar's Prime Minister Sheikh Mohammed bin Abdulrahman Al Thani and officials from Hamas, announced the cessation of hostilities set to begin this Sunday. The deal stipulates a significant exchange involving the release of 33 Israeli hostages and 1000 Palestinian prisoners, signaling a monumental step towards reconciliation.

The phased agreement includes the withdrawal of Israeli forces to the Gaza border, facilitating the return of displaced Palestinians to their homes. Additionally, commitments were made to allow substantial shipments of humanitarian aid and to rebuild healthcare facilities, which are crucial for Gaza's war-torn population.

Over 46,000 Palestinians, mostly civilians, have lost their lives with thousands more displaced. The Israeli side has also mourned the loss of civilians and soldiers in significant numbers. 1,139 people have died in Israel since October 7, according to Al Jazeera. The ceasefire also comes amidst severe international scrutiny and pressure, with incidents of sexual violence and potential war crimes drawing global condemnation of the hostilities. Both Israel and Hamas have faced backlash for their tactics. Last December an Amnesty International investigation concluded that Israel is "committing genocide" in Gaza.

Internationally, the ceasefire could recalibrate relations in the Middle East, affecting dynamics with Iran and potentially reducing proxy conflicts. While the ceasefire offers a much-needed pause and a glimmer of hope for a war-weary population, it is only a first step. The road to a lasting peace requires diligent international supervision and genuine commitment to dialogue from all stakeholders.

And now I will not make a cheese pun. That's called restraint. If you're ever involved in a Middle East conflict? Take note. Read More

From @cheddar

It's like calling an Uber for your trash.

HARR-E, Oshkosh's autonomous trash robot, could revolutionize waste collection. When your bin is full, just summon it, and HARR-E comes to your door to pick up the trash.

Shown at CES 2025, HARR-E is equipped with advanced sensors and autonomous navigation, designed for planned communities and business parks with central refuse centers—and clearly not my fourth-floor walkup apartment—though a market release timeline is still TBD.

Follow @cheddar on Instagram!

3. The Most Important Thing We're Not Talking About Enough: Cybersecurity

In today's interconnected world, cybersecurity threats are more prevalent and impactful than ever. From geopolitical tensions to ransomware attacks, the risks are multifaceted and constantly evolving. We recently had the *sponsored by EY* opportunity to speak with Jim Guinn, EY's cybersecurity leader, about the current state of things, and what organizations can do to protect themselves. You might have guessed it, but one of the things they can do is speak to Jim Guinn and his people about cybersecurity. Still.

"You have a myriad of factors in today's world," Guinn said. "You've got a lot of geopolitical activity that's going on."

No sh*t, lady, do I sound like I'm ordering a pizza?

That's my response, there, to paraphrase Bruce Willis playing policeman John McClane in everyone's favorite counter-terrorist Christmas movie, Die Hard.

Guinn emphasized that geopolitical tensions (see the story above, the story above that, and potentially most of the other stories in the world, right now, although not the next two, if you'd like to skip ahead) are exacerbating the already significant threats posed by cybercriminals and ransomware gangs. "Nation-state actors" are actively probing for vulnerabilities, seeking to gain access and "pre-position themselves" for potential future attacks, he said. It all sounds terrifying.

Guinn also highlighted the risks associated with transition periods, whether it's a corporate leadership change, a merger, or a political transition like the one we're currently "experiencing" in the U.S. government (again, see the story at the top, there). These transitions can create vulnerabilities that cyber attackers are eager to exploit, he said.

Guinn said organizations should understand where threats are coming from, identify potential threats, educate employees, test their systems, and know what's on their networks. My banking password is still "password one," so I should probably just call EY and pay them to do it, I reckon. Read More

4. Will Woolly Mammoths Walk the Earth Again?

Ben Lamm, the co-founder and CEO of Colossal Biosciences, talked with us about the field of "de-extinction" and the company's ambitious projects. De-extinction involves "identifying all the genes in an extinct species" and then comparing them to the closest living relative. By using genetic engineering tools like CRISPR (not related to the bottom drawer in your fridge) scientists can "take the genes that are from the mammoth, that made a mammoth a mammoth, and engineer them into its closest living relative being the Asian elephant."

Great balls of fire, this sounds ridiculously dangerous.

Lamm, a self-proclaimed technology entrepreneur, was drawn to the project by its potential for positive impact. He was inspired by George Church, a renowned geneticist at Harvard, who envisioned bringing back the woolly mammoth to help restore the Arctic ecosystem. Colossal Biosciences isn't just focused on bringing back extinct species. The company is also committed to developing technologies that can be used for conservation and human healthcare. Lamm emphasized that "all of the technologies that we make that have an application for conservation we give to the world for free."

Lamm revealed that Colossal Biosciences is "on track" to achieve their goal of having the first mammoth calves by 2028. However, due to the 22-month gestation period of mammoths, another species might be "returned to the earth from extinction" first. In addition to the woolly mammoth, Colossal Biosciences is also working on de-extinction projects for the dodo and the Tasmanian tiger.

Did this man not see Jurassic Park? Lamm said the movie's premise of extracting DNA from amber is not scientifically feasible, sounding an awful lot like a man who may have tried. But his work has attracted the attention of high-profile investors, including filmmaker Peter Jackson. Lamm described Jackson as a "big thinker" and "technologist" who is passionate about the potential of de-extinction. He also made Lord of the Rings which as we all know qualifies him for excommunication and ultimately death.

Colossal Biosciences' work is groundbreaking and has the potential to reshape our understanding of conservation and biodiversity. While the idea of bringing back extinct species may seem like science fiction, Lamm and his team are making it a reality — or at least they're talking like they are. Let's see how those mammoth calves fare before we all get too excited, eh? And for God's sake, don't try this stuff with any velociraptors. Read More

5. Your Car Could Be a 360-Degree Sound Sanctuary

I recently rented an Audi with Bang and Olufsen speakers, and I've got to say I loved it. Listening to Taylor Swift as one barreled down the Eastern Shore, it almost felt worth spending 80 grand on a motor vehicle. Imagine playing Don Henley in that thing, or better yet? The music of his Lordship, the Right Honorable Lord Emperor, Phil Collins.

That's right. The automotive industry is not just about horsepower and handling anymore; it's also about creating an immersive audio experience like something out of the movie American Psycho. Dolby Atmos, a spatial audio technology, is changing the way we experience music in our cars. Dolby Atmos is an immersive audio technology that allows artists to create a more emotional and immersive listening experience. Unlike traditional stereo sound, Dolby Atmos uses multiple speakers to place sounds precisely around the listener, creating a 360-degree soundstage.

You know where that works particularly well? Cars!

Dolby Atmos has seen widespread adoption in the music industry, with many top artists now creating music in the format. Cadillac has partnered with Dolby to bring studio-quality sound to its new electric vehicle, the Lyriq. The Lyriq features 19 "strategically placed speakers," although none directly under your butt, sadly, which seems like a huge, missed opportunity. Read More