Jul 29, 2024

Have Edam Good Monday!

I realize Edam is a low-hanging fruit of the cheese-pun family, although last week I went more obscure, mentioning an odd Italian cheese crawling with maggots, and my editor slapped me on the wrist. In a perverse twist, I enjoyed that. So, to begin this week, I'm going to say you mite like to try Milbenkäse, which is a German cheese made from mite's 💩. Imaginative!

The cheddlines:

I hope your week gets off to a fantastic start. Still, if you're a mite-bit sad, look on the bright side. Let's turn that 💩 into (Olympic) gold!

Matt Davis, N2K Chedditor

P.S. We've got a hot air balloon on Instagram that will "carry tourists into space" although nobody is getting me in that thing in a billion years, mate.

1. This Still Isn't Quite the Day to Check Your 401(k)

If you managed to avoid peeping at your 401(k) on Friday, well done. Because it would have started the day with a bloodbath. Now, you might want to continue avoiding it for a few more days, but the good news is that if you can stay patient, the markets look like they might soon claw back all of last week's losses, based on their surprisingly strong performance on Friday.

What's going on? In a remarkable turnaround, Wall Street ended a week full of twists on a strong note, defying the odds with widespread gains across the board. Stocks surged in near-unison, spearheaded by stronger than expected profits from companies like 3M, which as far as I know makes 3.5-inch floppy disks, which I haven't needed since the 1990s. And, er…chemicals, I guess?

The S&P 500 rose by 1.3%, while the Dow soared up 746 points, or 1.9%, in a midday rally. The Nasdaq also rose by 1.1%. Throughout the week, Wall Street had been remarkably volatile after Alphabet and Tesla posted profits that were still in the billions of dollars, but not as high as analysts had hoped, given the hoped-for impact of AI on both companies' bottom lines.

Adding to the positive finale, a fresh inflation update (it's still falling!) provided investors with renewed hope for a September rate cut by the Fed. Data also revealed a slight decrease in consumer prices for June. In other words? It's a confusing time on the stock market. Is it good? Is it bad? Is it meh? We think so! But of course, we'll keep you posted! Read More

2. A Deep Dive Into the Paris Olympics—With a Diving Coach!

Diver David Boudia won gold for team USA in London in 2012 and is now back as the U.S. diving coach in Paris. We caught up with him to talk about what the heck that's like. He said there's a remarkable level of security in place, and talked about the weight on a diver's shoulders. They train all year-round, just to put it all into action in the blink of an eye. It's just like writing a newsletter!

Most people don't realize this, but Olympic athletes don't get paid to compete, either, which is why Toyota's sponsorship is so pivotal, he said. (Hey Toyota! Know what else you could sponsor?👍👍)

Speaking of gold, Team USA have a great shot at a winning medal in the men's three-meter synchronized diving event, Diver Dave said. Cheddar anchor Dave Briggs dutifully asked him about the Olympics' "anti-intimacy beds" made of cardboard, and how it is to be a "coach in the city of love."

"These athletes have trained super hard for this Olympic moment. And so, yeah, just like any other person, they're going to unwind and relax," Diver Dave said. "Some do it in different ways. But right now, we're trying to focus."

I bet you are, DD. Then he mentioned again how helpful it is to have Toyota's sponsorship. Which we thought showed good grace under pressure, just as you'd expect from a world champion diver. Watch out for the splash! Read More

From @cheddar

Space is just a balloon ride away. 🌌🎈Space Perspective, a Florida-based company, is making space travel accessible with its innovative SpaceBalloon, which carries a pressurized capsule allowing up to eight passengers to embark on a round-trip journey to the edge of space, lasting around six hours.

The firm plans to launch its first commercial space flights in 2025, with tickets already selling for $125,000 each.

We'll keep our $125K if that's alright, though. Because this thing looks like a claustrophobe's nightmare! 😱

Follow @cheddar on Instagram!

3. Videogame Performers Will Strike Over AI Concerns

I tend to think modern computer games are a bit stupid because they lack wit. The last time I enjoyed them was playing The Legend of Monkey Island in the 1990s. Although a friend of mine called Cyrus, who lives in Berlin, did just release an indie game called Vampire Therapist, where you guide vampires through centuries of emotional baggage with real cognitive behavioral techniques. Apparently even vampires need a shoulder to cry on, although I'd be worried they might reach up and go for my neck.

But yeah. Computer games generate more than $100 billion annually, a testament to the creative and technical labor that brings games to life, however ridiculous I might find them. Grand Theft Boring. And what have you. Give me a level or two of old-fashioned Chuckie Egg on the BBC Micro emulator any day. I didn't even like Street Fighter or Mortal Kombat. Dullsville!

Still. In the heart of Los Angeles, the voices and movers behind some of your favorite digital characters are picking up picket signs in the latest battle between labor rights and AI. SAG-AFTRA, representing Hollywood's video game performers, announced a strike starting last Friday.

For nearly two years, negotiations with gaming juggernauts—including divisions of Activision, Warner Bros., and Disney—have come to a screeching halt over how generative AI should be harnessed. While the union celebrated strides in wages and job safety, the looming specter of unregulated AI remained a point of contention. The bottom line? This is an era where your movements and voice can be replicated by AI, creating digital clones without your nod or a slice of the profit pie. The union fears game companies could make actors and their unique performances obsolete. Game producers claim their offer includes "meaningful AI protections," yet the union argues they're not meaningful enough.

The union argues that all performances, from soldiers to zombies, deserve protection. I'm inclined, frankly, to agree with them. Especially with such enormous profits at stake. Meanwhile I do wish people making computer games would do their best to inject them with a tad more irony. Monkey Island was so special. It was almost like doing something else, like watching an episode of The Young Ones, or something. I miss that vibe. Maybe if we did more to diversify the tech industry so that more different kinds of people could thrive in its employ, we might foster a slightly more interesting end product? The good news is, I believe there's a name for such initiatives, and that Elon "Just Call Me DEI" Musk is a major fan. Read More

You Need 2 Know About This Box!

Meet the Sunset Box, a quarterly subscription service sending home, wellness, and travel goodies straight to your doorstep, curated by editors at mag Sunset, the Western-lifestyle magazine that just so happens to be a sister company of ours.

Since you clearly have good taste (you're an N2K subscriber, after all), we think you'll love this box. Use code CHEDDAR15 for 15% off your subscription.

Gimme the Box!

Note: Sadly does not contain any cheese.

OpenAI Testing New Search Technology to Make It More <s>Annoying</s> Conversational

4. OpenAI Testing New Search Technology to Make It More Annoying Conversational

OpenAI, known for its trailblazing advancements in AI, has taken a bold step into the future with the unveiling of SearchGPT, its new AI-powered search engine. The prototype aims to redefine how we harness the vast expanse of the Internet, promising an innovative melding of conversational AI and real-time web search capabilities. Also: Access is still limited. So, I just joined the waitlist. Grr. Make me sort of want a thing, then deny me the thing. That's a sure way to irritate the bejesus out of me!

SearchGPT transforms online queries into interactive dialogues, offering up-to-date information directly sourced from across the web. It sounds a bit like Google, and a bit like that mate of yours, Terry, down at the pub, who insists on Googling everything, anytime you're off on a flight of fanciful b.s., and then turning everything into an argument. Terry is such a jerk, though. Like I wanted to be able to lie through my teeth about the history of the game of darts over a few beers without him telling everybody I was full of it. He was ruining my flow.

So. Let's hope SearchGPTerry (that's 100% what the T stands for) is a tad less annoying once they let a fella in. OpenAI wants to make sure it takes advantage of its recently inked relationships with news agencies to ensure you get "high-quality content." Although what are we? Chopped liver? What's wrong with relying on N2K content for your "dialogues," Terry, huh? Read More

5. Southwest Gets Rid of Open Seating

True story: United Airlines just charged me $3,000 to change some tickets to go to London in August, to see my mom, who has Alzheimer's. The reason I had to change the tickets in the first place is we had an unexpected death in the family. All I'll say to that is that it makes it a little galling when I hear them tell me to "Fly the Friendly Skies…"

Still. Southwest is a budget airline. There's no way they'd pull any kind of switcheroo on us, is there? Is there?

Well. Get ready to bid farewell to the scramble for seats on Southwest.

Hang on, that actually sounds alright. In a bold move that marks the end of its unique open seating tradition, Southwest is introducing assigned seating to meet the overwhelming preference of its customers, with a whopping 80% favoring assigned seats over the current system. I've not flown Southwest, but I've flown Easyjet in the U.K., and they have a similar recreation of the Hunger Games whenever it's time to board.

Seats with extra legroom are also on their way, with about one-third of Southwest's fleet to boast the option. Southwest is also rolling out overnight flights, a first, starting Valentine's Day 2025, when presumably they'll also need to install "anti-intimacy" bathrooms, inspired by those cardboard beds at the Olympics, unless they want to also employ a crisis management PR firm at the same time.

CEO Bob Jordan sees this as a "monumental shift," as CEOs are wont to do, any time they introduce a reasonably minor change to their cherished companies, aiming to "refine nearly every aspect of the Southwest experience." Let's just see how easy it is to change our tickets following a family tragedy, Bob, eh? Then let us be the judge. Read More